So, I have had quite a time of it lately, and I have found myself casting about trying to lay blame at someone or something's feet. And then last night I reminded myself...that I am in control of what goes in my body, how much energy I expend, what I eat, how much I exercise and how I take care of my health...nobody else gets the blame and nobody else gets the credit! It's me alone! I think that will help me continue being successful.
Last week my oldest son turned 21 and with that and several business meetings and engagements being away from home took it's toll on my health plan. I drank too much, ate the wrong stuff, stayed up way too late, didn't take my medicine and vitamins most of the week and yet surprisingly didn't gain any weight!!! But even when I got back home with the vow to get my arse back on track I found little ways to sabotage my progress every day, which led to frustration and inevitable blame shifting. Was it the men in my life that keep steering me off track? My wrongful thinking that "it probably doesn't matter in the long run", my attitude that I only go around once and I may as well enjoy it while I'm here...a long list of BS filtered it's way through my head and all I can do is counter that by calling myself out! I'm in control, success or failure lay at my feet!
Somehow this got through to my rather stubborn mindset and I feel a fresh new determination to see this whole thing through. Am I scared? Hells Yes!!! Of what I don't even know but I am going to get heatlhy, lose enough weight that I fit into normal off the rack clothes, allow myself to eventually get into a great relationship with some awesome man and be a success with my creative self! I'm not sure exactly how I'm going to achieve all this but letting go of old fears, taking personal responsibility and being diligent will all play a part! So, here's to me and the power I hold in shaping a beautiful life for myself!
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